2.05.2010

Crush

CAUTION: I've done no surveys, polls, or interviews on this subject. I am not certified in any official way to be writing about this subject. The only research I've done is going to school, socializing, and observing.

Being a teenager, I know how it feels to want what isn't attainable.
Girls, we all thing that the 1st String QB is H-O-T! HOT! He probably has girls lining up at his feet to wash his socks! (I apologize for the over-exaggeration.)
Boys, we all know that most of you want one thing, and, sadly, a few of you will get it. (Please don't jump out of your chairs to get on your knees and pray that you'll be one of the "lucky" few. Emphasis on the quotes. If you could see me saying this, you'd be overwhelmed by the immense air quotes. Those boys aren't lucky.)
Both genders, we all have crushes at some point in our lives. If you don't, I'm going to have to doubt your humanity.

I have a crush. (Loyal readers, I'm sorry that you have to keep hearing this over and over again. New readers, I'm sure that's no shock to you.) It's involuntary. Time and time again, I tell myself that I don't want to like him anymore. My mind is battling itself. I don't know what I want, and it's a horrible feeling! I did realize, however, that my odds are higher in the "get hurt" category than in the "get it all" category. Why can't I just snap my fingers and be done with this? Wouldn't life be so much nicer if it were that simple? Yes, it would; but as my math teacher once said: "Simple is not the same as easy." If getting over someone were that simple, life would probably get harder. Yes, we'd get over people as we pleased, but that would leave more time for another crush to sink in. Then another. And another. Get what I'm saying?

The biggest mistake made by love-struck teenagers is telling their secrets. There's always that one girl who blabs every secret as soon as she finds out about them. Why do we tell? Here's my theory: Deep down inside of us, no matter how much we may deny it, we are desperate for our crush to find out. We think, "Maybe if he finds out, he'll like me back....and then we'll get married and have four beautiful kids......." No. Don't even go there. Please, for all our sakes, and especially your own, don't go there.

CONFESSION: I do want him to know. If he knows, I'll be able to talk to him and we can sort this out. I can say, "______, do you like me at all? I need to know, because if you don't, I need to figure out how to get over you; but if you do, then maybe we can make this work. Or we can just be friends." I have a feeling that if he were to read this, he'd realize that I'm talking about him.

I'm talking about you, _______. By the way, feel free to text me. I'm pretty sure I'm not busy. Never am. ;)

If he reads this, my life as I know it will be over. It will either change for the better or for the worse..... I'm hoping it's for the better.

A.R.: Thank you for reading this. You're a great friend. You really are. Can you tell now that when I say that I know how you feel that I mean what I'm saying? You're not alone and you know that you can always come to me. I may not be able to give you much advice, but I do know that venting feels really good. Go for it.

E.W.: I know you're reading this. You read all my posts, which makes me feel awesome! Thanks for following and actually reading this blog! You rock! (P.S. ROCK CHALK, JAYHAWK!)

_._.: You should feel really powerful, because you have more power over me than you even know. Lucky. You may already know that I like you, but just in case, I really do. You're hilarious, intelligent, and the sweetest guy I've ever met. Also, I think you're pretty dang cute, which is definitely a perk! All my friends say that they could see us together, and I could too. Please, just take time to try to realize the same. If you can't, please tell me so I'm not hanging onto false hopes.

"If you'd just realize what I just realized: That we'd be perfect for each other and we'll never find another. Just realize what I just realized: We'd never have to wonder if we missed out on each other now."~~Colbie Caillat

I didn't proofread this post, so if there're any errors... MY BAD! It's also late. 11:59. I better post this so it says I posted it today and not tomorrow, which starts in a minute. Posting now. Thanks for reading.

Have a good night/day (depends on when you're reading this), everyone.

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