2.17.2010

What a Mess!

Sorry that I haven't posted in a while. It's been a pretty busy February for me. Today is Ash Wednesday, which means I have to fast and for the next 40 days of my life, I will be eating no junk food!! NONE!! That means no candy, chips, soday, popcorn, cake..... pretty much anything sweet or abnormally salty. I will be living on fruit, salads, and turkey sandwiches. How do you like them apples? (No pun intended.)

I have 17 mintues to kill before I leave for school. Lucky for you, I had enough time to get on and make a post. So here we are.... what's new with me?

I think I'm finally getting over him. Does it mean I'm getting over him if he seems to show up everywhere I go? Or that instead of thinking his little antics in class are hilarious, I think they're just annoying? I also don't get nervous around him anymore... this is good. It's making me sad though. Just a little bit. Having a crush is kinda fun at the same time as it is painful. It makes you look forward to something; makes you hopeful. I still have things to be hopeful for, but nothing like this.

I keep asking myself why I was so reluctant to get over him in the first place. Then it hit me...like a car accident. (It's been long enough for me to turn the event of my rear-ending into a joke.) I was so reluctant to stop liking him because I thought, "If I get over him, and then find out he likes me back, that's a huge mess. Maybe I'd have to let him down like he let me down." But at the same time I wanted to get over him because I thought, "If he doesn't like me, I'm holding onto false hopes and just putting myself through pain."

Life is messy. Don't you think so?

Well it's about time for me to head out, so I'll try to keep up with these posts and not let my messy life interfere.

Have a fantastic day!

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